Citizen’s Gas: Saving You Money…

Saving You Money

OK…first of all, let me start by saying that I wasn’t going to post anything tonight because I’m ridiculously tired.  It took me 3.5 hours to go from I-465 (Brookville Exit) to I-69 (96th Street Exit) to I-70 (MLK Exit) to I-465 (37 South Exit) tonight.  There was one point while I was sitting on Michigan Street on the IUPUI campus, where everyone who was walking was going about 5-6 times faster than anyone driving.  I had an Office Space flashback of the Peter in the traffic jam with the old man with the walker passing him.  Snow sure is pretty…if you’re not driving in it.

With that said, I was working on some boring on-line stuff with my Citizen’s Gas account.  I tried to pull up my account several times (with no luck).  I kept getting an error that said something like: “We know you have an account with us, but our system sucks and won’t pull up your information.  Please try again if you’d like the same crap results”.  So I clicked somewhere else on their page and got the image above.

“All of the attractive customer service representatives are on other calls.  Your call is important to us.  If your call requires immediate assistance, please dial 0 for Helga”

I don’t know what to say about this picture.  I’ve heard so many PSAs this year from Citizen’s Gas about the prices going up …and their CEO is on-line weekly to answer questions, etc.   My first though after seeing this picture is: Why don’t they say they’re keeping their rates down by not hiring professional models?  I mean without getting mean for the sake of being mean… this is a very handsome woman… and she has a face for answering the phone.  Should her picture really be on the website?  Did they just not check their clip-art or what?

Way better than Helga...

Way better than Helga...

I found this picture on Google in about 30 seconds.  What’s wrong with this one?  I’d much rather talk to “teeth-whitener” girl than Helga… or at least see her picture on the website.

I guess what this really comes down to is business sense.  Does anyone really think that the women on the commercials for the 900 numbers are truly the same women on the other end of the phone?…NO.  And none of us really think that “teeth-whitener” girl is answering the phones at Citizen’s Gas, or ringing you up at Home Depot, or even telling you that your NSF fee total is $35 at your local bank office.

….BUT, good business people know how to craft that illusion…and today Citizen’s Gas and their Internet department get a big “F” (or the alternate: F.U.).  Come on guys….do something better with my $250/month.  I’m turning my thermostat to 40 on principal alone…Bastards.


January 28, 2009. Tags: . rants.


  1. Deej replied:

    That’s is so freaking funny! I love it. I thought at first you might go off on the so called “delivery” charge, but no, poor Helga. I’m still laughing!

  2. Pasquenot replied:

    Helga can keep the gas, but teeth-whitening lady? Well, I’ll lay the pipe for her. Roar!

  3. Churchlady replied:

    Thats just plain mean… don’t hate me cuz i’m handsome 😦

  4. Geeky Tai-Tai replied:

    It looks to me like Helga has used teeth-whitening lady’s teeth-whitener though. Her teeth are simply gleaming!

  5. wood replied:

    I talked to the gas company last week but helga had a male indian accent, go figure

  6. Doug Hodgdon replied:

    I read your blog the other day, and today I just happened upon this site (thanks to Thought you would enjoy it.

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